Back to the Biblical Basics of Marriage...a Parody

Last weekend at Cornerstone this little Branson parody preceded one of the best messages I've heard on marriage (click here for Paul Sabino's message on Ephesians 5).

Here it is y'all. JB and Linda showing their creative brilliance again with a little "Back to the Biblical Basics of Marriage"...

Odds and Ends

Still no baby as of 11:52 pm Thursday night. I'll keep you up to date.

Tonight Beck (4), said, "Mom, if you know Jesus you won't die when you have the baby, but if you don't know Jesus, you will die." Leatha said, "Beck, I could die, but since I know Jesus, I'll be with God forever." He said, "That's true. Good point, mom."

Darrell Green's hall of fame speech relates to my post on "Sex and Faithfulness." The whole thing is good, but at least start listening at 4:40. It reminded me of the Apostle Paul in 2 Timothy 4:7, saying at the end of his life, "I fought the good fight."

Also, good thoughts from Alex Tuckness on diamonds: click here.

I've enjoyed getting caught up on the New Perspective of Paul from Scot McKnight's blog: click here for the posts. This is one of the more important theological discussions going on right now. It's become John Piper Vs. N.T. Wright, with McKnight's blog representing the Wright camp. Great things to think about, but if you're not inclined to enjoy deep theological debates, don't waste your time... I'll consider writing a blog post summarizing what's at stake.

That last sentence was totally worthless.

So was that.

I'm going to bed.

Oh yeah, Salt was awesome tonight. I met a new guy that wandered into Cornerstone today seeking help in his relationship with Christ. He came tonight and met some great guys and got in their connection group. And once again, tons of international students were there. Two Chinese guys said, "Wow, someday we might be able to have the excitement that's in you guys."

This is church!

Thoughts on Sex and Faithfulness

"Sex isn't all it's cracked up to be."

I'll never forget that quote from a newly married TSC guy 10 years ago. I was not yet married, and thought to my 22 year old self, "Yeah, right. That dude must've gotten stuck with a bad wife. Bummer for him. I'll do better."

Now I think, "Dude had a point. It's nothing like I thought."

You see, immorality and promiscuity are more thrilling than purity and faithfulness. But only in the way that robbing a bank is more thrilling than going to work there.

Working for a paycheck is not always fun, but it's always good.

Sex is better than going to work, but you get the point.

Here's a related thought... Should you really say to your spouse, "I will NEVER cheat on you?"

Isn't that a little proud to say such a thing? After all, we're sinners in need of grace, and we are not beyond any sin. Right? "If you think you're standing firm, be careful that you don't fall..." (1 Cor. 10). How can you know you'll be faithful? The demon of adultery is just around the corner for all of us, waiting to jump out and overtake any helpless human being it seeks to devour.

Can you tell I'm setting you up?

I told Leatha tonight, "I will NEVER cheat on you."

It's not pride. It's not arrogance. It's merely restating a vow I said to her 9 1/2 years ago in front of about 300 friends and family. I think we should say this often, to our spouse and to ourself. And, in this case, to the world wide web. By God's grace, I will keep my vow. I will never be unfaithful.

And faithfulness is not necessarily as fun, but always in my best interest.

It's better to work at the bank than rob it.

Duh.

Be faithful (Proverbs 3:3-4).

An American Tragedy

A couple years ago, Leatha and I enjoyed spending an hour of our Monday nights watching a fun loving couple, Jon and Kate, raise their 8 children (twins and sextuplets). Last year, we slowly lost interest and stopped watching. We noticed that something was changing about this family.

Tonight we watched about 15 minutes of the show to find out that Jon and Kate were getting a divorce. Another American tragedy- for many reasons...

1. The recent explosion of communication mediums has been an incubator for narcissism and cult of personality. 

But in our present age, the heroes worshiped are normal people, not dictators. 

One of my mentors, David Churchill, who taught me how to watch movies, told me that the most prophetic movie of our time is the Truman Show. There is profound depth to the movie, but the basic story is people watching other people live. 

Spending our time watching other people live...what have we become? What have I become? (After all, I was one of those 20 million viewers...)

2. The "me" generation knows nothing about faithfulness and sacrifice

Jon and Kate looked like they had turned into a couple of teenagers- Kate with her new immodest wardrobe, and Jon with his earrings and skull tshirt (which had replaced the Isaiah t) arguing over such pettiness. 

Kate talked about how she feared they would be labeled as just another statistic. I think her real fear is that there will be consequences for their sin. There always is. And what is more... her kids will inherit the consequences of her unfaithfulness.

If you happen to be reading this and you have thought about divorce as an option for your current situation... send that thought back to hell. Don't say it or even think it. 

"Let love and faithfulness never leave you. Bind them around your neck. Write them on the tablet of your heart. Then you will win favor and a good name in the sight of God and men." Proverbs 3:3-4

3. "Better a little..."

We live in a culture of much. But wealth is such a trap. 

At some point the show went from a nice way to document their children's upbringing to "We're going to Hawaii...moving into a ??? million dollar home...traveling the U.S. to autograph books..." 

A mother of 8 on a book signing tour?

We look at people like that and are tempted to think, "They have it all and they are happy. Why can't I have that kind of life?"

If you're struggling with that, just watch the Madame Blueberry Veggie Tale DVD and remind yourself what great gain really is.

1 Timothy 6 and Proverbs 15 are well worth reflecting on. 

4. To the singles out there...

If you're dreaming about a great marriage someday, here's some advice: Be faithful today. Be pure today. Love God in a way that He's all you want and need today. 

In doing this, you will become a kind of person. 

You'll become the kind of person that is faithful and walks on a path of righteousness. 

You may have watched Jon and Kate and thought, "It can happen to anyone of us. Satan just snuck around the corner and zapped them. It could be me next." 

Not really. 

Over time they decided to let greed, fame, selfishness, pride, pleasure, and unfaithfulness turn their hearts from Matthew 6:33 "Seek first...". 

Those sins were welcomed into their home one compromise at a time. At some sad point, those 32 year old teenagers I was watching tonight opened wide the door of destruction, becoming another American tragedy. 

"God, reveal to me the ways in which I've allowed apathy, complacency, lukewarm faith, and languid service to creep into my soul. Release in me a longing for the unseen, where Christ is all in all. Guide me on a path of righteousness for Your name's sake, chasing me with goodness and mercy, leading me not into temptation. Give me a dangerous faith that involves sacrificial love-first for my wife and children, and then to those you put in my path. I am a sinner saved by grace. And in grace I will now stand. Amen."

Song of Songs

Yesterday I listened to this message by Mark Driscoll on "The Dance of Mahanaim." It's considered one of the most erotic passage in the Bible. 

It is said that sex is one of the top conflicts in marriage (right up there with finances and in-laws). So that means that many of you married folk who are reading this might benefit from this sermon. I haven't listened to the whole series, but it also might be a good listen for you and your spouse if you are struggling in this area.

If you are single, it might be a good listen because it's in the Bible.

Recently, someone gave a talk at a conference (strategic ambiguity) and was very critical of Driscoll's openness in talking about sex. He referred to it as the "pornification of the pulpit." I'm not sure if the guy who was giving the talk has ever worked with youth, or himself been through junior high and high school. 

Every year in our youth group we would get the "purity" talks. They talked about "petting" and whether or not it was ok. I think that's the proper way to talk about it without being lewd and uncouth. "Petting"?! Here's an unhelpful thing to say to a teenager, "Petting is wrong." Try this: "If she's not your wife, keep your mouth off her mouth and your hands off her chest" (or you can actually tell them not to touch her boobs if you want them to really get the point. In talking to the teenager in person I would get even more specific. But I don't think the world wide web is ready for that).

All this to say, a culture that is so saturated with sex, and therefore profoundly confused, needs to be confronted with a redeemed view of God's design. Props to Driscoll for speaking on this. You can podcast the whole Song of Songs series on iTunes for free. 

Somewhat related...

I was in on an email discussion about the theology of rewards in heaven. It's hard for us to imagine what rewards will be like in heaven, because we are limited by our experience of the pleasures of this life. As Peter Kreeft said, "We are like concerned children asking if married couples can eat candy while having sex."

Thanks, Peter Swanson for the quote and great thoughts on rewards!

Speaking of Sex...

If you're single, please skip this post and come back after you get married...

This article in Christianity Today is a must read for married couples. Here's all you really need to know- it's about sex.

You can thank me later for this post.